Just wanted to say that I had the same problem to an extent. I learned mandolin from the older bluegrass pickers in my family and ended up with a Breedlove KO. Huge frets, wide nut and neck, long scale. Then I was introduced to Calace, Gioviale and the like. Now I've got girly hands and fingers also which compounded the problem. I could never make the stretches for some Duo Styles, and my fingers kept landing in the wrong place for the highs.
Then one year the wife bought me an old Suzuki bowlback (No.45) as a gift and there it was. The sound and the feel I was looking for. Smaller frets, thinner neck, shorter scale, vibrant sound and no plunk, etc. The Neapolitan style mandolin was built for this style of music and in my opinion is the only thing for it. I was also surprised at how the shape of the bowl aids in dropping the left hand where it needs to be.
Just my 2 cents. Hope it helps.
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