Top Ten Signs That You Are Into Bluegrass

[mandopete]

All right, the mandolin humor thread made me think of this topic. I have been trying to come up with David Letterman style "Top Ten" list for bluegrass and I thought the folks here on the Cafe could help.

Here's my start....

Top Ten Signs That You Are Into Bluegrass...

#10: His and her monogrammed lawnchairs.

[mandolooter]

#9. You have just 3 tooths!

[miked500]

#8 Chop, Roll and Dog House are all perfectly acceptable musical terms.

[Dennis Ladd]

#7 You have all of Del McCoury's CDs and would play them all the time if people would let you. (But they don't.)

[Boy Howdy]

You play a $3,000 mandolin on a threadbare couch...

[MikeEdgerton]

#5.... You know what has 27 legs and three teeth

[chip]

You have a $20,000 mandolin and live in your pickup....

[Bill Snyder]

#5.... You know what has 27 legs and three teeth

I may regret this but can you enlighten me?

[MikeEdgerton]

I may regret this but can you enlighten me?

The front row of a (Insert a bluegrass band name here) concert.

[barney 59]

If you think that a cover of a 45 year old Bob Dylan song is radical.

[Bill James]

If you think that "Kettle Corn" is one of the four major food groups.

[KMaynard]

If you believed "Dr. Ralph Stanley" was really a Presidential Candidate.

[sunburst]

You think Del McCoury sings tenor and Placido Domingo sings "oprey" (if you even know who he is).

[Fretbear]

You have the first clue who Bessie Lee Mauldin is....

[Chris Biorkman]

You're married to your first cousin.

[mandopete]

Love it, love it, love it - keep 'em comming!

Here's another one...

When your boss says "take a break" you look around for a microphone.

Bill James - you have a promising 2nd career as a comedy writer, LOL!

[MikeEdgerton]

July 9, 1923 is a more significant date than July 4, 1776.

[John McGann]

You understand the historical significance, lineage, and pedigree of the accordion in pre-Flatt and Scruggs era Bill Monroe music.

[Bob Andress]

You named your kids Bill, Lester, and Earl (regardless of gender).

[MikeEdgerton]

You named your kids Bill, Lester, and Earl (regardless of gender).

Now, that was good.

[leathermarshmallow]

You know the real use of a wash tub and a broom handle.

[andyjingram]

You can play 'Whiskey before Breakfast'.

Before Breakfast.

After a couple of whiskeys...

[man dough nollij]

You know the real use of a wash tub and a broom handle.

You know the proper scale length of a broom handle, and can spend hours online discussing proper intonation...

[mandozilla]

1.) You know a G Run isn't a marathon race.

2.) You know that WSM, besides being the call letters of the Grand Ole Opry, are Bill monroe's initial.

3.) You know that Arnold Schultz isn't the guy who runs the drive-in on the TV show "Happy Days".

4.) You can sing the Marhta White theme song.

5.) You know that the Stanley Brothers recorded Bill Monroe's number "Molly and Tenbrooks" before Bill did.

6.) You know that Sally Ann Forrester's real first name in Wilene.

7.) You know who the BlueGrass Boys' first banjo picker was.

8.) You've seen every bluegrass video on You Tube...twice.

9.) You'd rather attend Bean Blossom than go to Hawaii or the Caribean.

10.) You know the brand of overalls (Pointer) that Mike Compton wears.

[DannyB]

You tell your wife you're taking her on a beautiful Caribbean vacation and forget to mention it's a Bluegrass Cruise.