Who writes this stuff?

[John McCoy]

Say what you will about this instrument.

I just want someone to explain this one line in the write-up:

On a scale of 1 to 10, this example is in great shape....

[Denny Gies]

Does he walk to school or carry his lunch?

[journeybear]

In a manner of speaking, I never met a metaphor that couldn't be mixed. Hackneyed phrases like little things mean so much when improperly garbled. As the crow flies, I would run down a long and winding road. And when you come to a fork in the road, take it. You're running out of time to not bid on this.

[John McCoy]

And remember to never split infinitives. That is something up with which I cannot put.

[pfox14]

On a scale of 1 to 10 the eBay description is awful.

[Charlieshafer]

I think it's pretty obvious, myself. Clearly he meant 7.23.

[delsbrother]

This one goes to 11.

[Karl Keating]

If you buy it, then all I can say to you is, You've buttered your bread, now sleep in it.

[epicentre]

On a scale of 1 - 10, he has a feedback of 100%. Perhaps his e.bay service is better than his writing, but the latter definitely needs some assistance.

To be taken at bedtime with a grain of sand...................

[Seonachan]

Oh, you may think he's not the sharpest egg in the drawer, but I'll bet he's got an ace up his hole.

[Mandolin Mick]

Yeah, first thing I did was check out his positive feedback and what he sells. People seem happy with his instruments. Seems to be an upstanding person.

[mandolirius]

"on a scale of one to ten", "at the end of the day" "going forward".....and on and on. Once these catchphrases become common-speak, people just start throwing them in for no useful purpose. Mostly notice it in speech but sometimes in writitng too. That's why I hate them - they eat braincells. And don't even get me started on "literally".

[Charlieshafer]

yeah, whatever.

[allenhopkins]

After reading Cafe posts for six or more years, I find that mandolin expertise does not correlate one-to-one with grammatical prowess…

In fact, it's like comparing apples to a horse of another color, through a glass darkly.

However, I will point out that about half our writers are above average.

[brunello97]

After reading Cafe posts for six or more years, I find that mandolin expertise does not correlate one-to-one with grammatical prowess….

Right said, Allen. I'd gladly suffer a dozen Ebay Norm Crosbys over a single "mandolin tasting" with some "Gibbys" or whatever excruciating slang gets shoveled out around here. Actually "Gibbys" is the worst: Brutally moronic. (No smiley face.)

Mick

[journeybear]

One may merely muse how you would feel about someone praising the woody tone of his Gibby mando. Yikes!

However, I will point out that about half our writers are above average.

Statistically, on the money.

While we're on the subject (more or less) of trite phrases ... One time one of my local grocery stores had a sale on frozen burritos, 3/$1. I chose six chicken and six beef, putting them in a (thus conveniently available) box that held a dozen. At checkout, the young cashier asked how many I had. I replied, "Six of one, half a dozen of the other." She looked at me with a blank, almost quizzical stare. It went right over her head. The woman behind me, about my age, cracked up though, to hear this hackneyed phrase actually being used in a sentence. I like colorful turns of phrase, even if they are trite, and when they can be used in some clever fashion - true, a challenge - it can be amusing. Anyway, I said "Twelve" and the world began to turn again ...

[Andrew B. Carlson]

As Yogi Berra once said, "I wish I had an answer to that question, because I'm tired of answering it."

For your enjoyment.

[Bertram Henze]

"on a scale of one to ten", "at the end of the day" "going forward".....and on and on. Once these catchphrases become common-speak, people just start throwing them in for no useful purpose.

I have a colleague whose speech on the phone sometimes contains up to 80% of that stuff. Listening gets old quickly. No wonder he can never line up his ducks to swing for the fence...

[Astro]

"Just sayin", (what were you considering, hand signals?) "in my opinion" (thanks for that clarification, I thought you were giving someone else's opinion),....

Thats a horse of a different tune.

Many laughs. I loved this thread. Too many great posts to individually thank--Chuckling a big thanks to all.

[jim simpson]

A friend told me of a dispute with the buyer of his house. My friend had a lawyer write a response to some issues the buyer thought were legit. The buyer responded that he couldn't afford a lawyer and said he "was caught between a rock and a revolving glass door".

We like to mix metaphors for fun in honor of his statement.

[bootinz]

you all are a tough crowd

[lenf12]

I was listening to the local TV news this morning and one of illustrious civic leaders commented "this situation is not only difficult to understand, it's uncomprehensible (sic)".

Len B.
Clearwater, FL

[journeybear]

Inconceivable! (See "The Princess Bride" for a detailed dressing-down of the character who (incomprehensibly ) insists on using this interjection emphatically and erroneously.)

I miss George Carlin, whose insightful and incisive observations about the foibles of the English language and the follies of those who mangled it, willingly or unknowingly, were manifold and hilarious. They made me more than happy - and oh, did he ever take that nonsensical locution to task! Genius.

[Ed Goist]

"on a scale of one to ten", "at the end of the day" "going forward".....and on and on. Once these catchphrases become common-speak, people just start throwing them in for no useful purpose. Mostly notice it in speech but sometimes in writitng too. That's why I hate them - they eat braincells. And don't even get me started on "literally".

This is literally my favorite post of the year so far.

[journeybear]

On a not-entirely-unrelated note, I just happened across this remarkable site - http://www.bartleby.com - which offers an impressive number of great literary works online for free. I found it while searching for the exact quote from Shakespeare's "Romeo And Juliet" ("what's in a name" etc.), and discovered his entire works are there. What brought the notion of sharing this with all y'all was that, while scanning through their listings, I found this classic tome: The Elements of Style by William Strunk, Jr. I am going to find the time to revisit this significant stylistic guide (high school was a long time ago) as my writing style could use a little sprucing up. Strunk addresses a lot of these very issues directly here. Literally!

I admit to being more of a usage-oriented bloke than a strict adherent to The Rules, rigidity being a concept I am not particularly fond of, and tend to favor natural locution with disregard for some of the formations The Rules insist are the ones to which we must adhere. I simply do not care for clumsy-sounding language, even if formed in the manner directed by correctness. At any rate, it behooves me to reacquaint myself with these rules so I may at least knowingly use or abuse them, as I see fit, so to speak.